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Though gay men have been fathers forever, gay men consciously having children in the context ofpartnered same-sex relationships is a recent social phenomenon. As men pioneer this new form offamily, there has been precious little literature to light the way. Gerald Mallon's book is a beaconfor scholars and researchers in this new field of study, but most of all, for gay men setting forth onthe journey to dadhood. See All Customer Reviews. Shop Books. Read an excerpt of this book!

Add to Wishlist. USD Sign in to Purchase Instantly. Overview Gay parenting is a topic on which almost everyone has an opinion but almost nobody has any facts. This book reveals how very natural and possible gay parenthood can be.

Gay Men Answer Dating, Relationship, and Marriage Questions

What factors influence this decision? How do the experiences of gay dads compare to those of heterosexual men? How effectively do professional services such as support groups serve gay fathers and prospective gay fathers? Gay Men Choosing Parenthood challenges a great deal of misinformation, showing how gay fathers from different backgrounds adapted, perceived, and constructed their options and their families. About the Author Gerald P. He lives in New York City.

Show More. Average Review. These included how the couple came to the decision Reprint requests: Dorothy A. TABLE 1 TABLE 2 Medical evaluation of male same-sex couples undergoing Examples of male same-sex couples seeking parenthood assisted reproduction treatment using donor oocyte s through assisted reproduction. Case 1: A and L Medical evaluation of the The couple has been in a committed relationship for 6 years.

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The carrier gave birth to January 1, January 1, a baby girl. Two years later, the couple came back with Hepatitis B surface antigen Hepatitis B surface antigen the same carrier and had a frozen embryo transfer Hepatitis B core antibody Hepatitis B core antibody resulting in the birth of a baby boy. The couple reports that they both CMV antibody come from large, supportive families who have encouraged them to become parents.

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They pursued Note: Based on U. Subsequently, they of the gay couple providing sperm 24 , but the use of reproductive cells or tissue from an ineligible directed donor is not prohibited were encouraged by gay friends who became parents Similarly, neither quarantine of the directed donor semen nor re- through assisted reproduction.

They were matched to testing of the directed donor is required They Greenfeld. Gay men and ART.

Gay Parenthood and the End of Paternityas We Knew It — The Revealer

Fertil Steril Case 3: G and J The Hispanic couple has been together for 10 years. When a 2-year-old they had fostered from birth and their plans for disclosure to offspring about the nature of their and hoped to adopt was returned to his biological conception. A family member agreed tained the medical history of both partners and provided an explanation of the to carry the pregnancy, and they used an anonymous procedures involved in ART using oocyte donation and gestational surrogacy.

After the medical Medical screening also included the U.

A description of with the understanding that the two best embryos would the medical screening is presented in Table 1. As it turned out, two embryos were The average age of the men in this study was Twelve couples from the United States, two couples from Europe, and one couple from Canada came specifically for this Greenfeld.

All couples lived together, were in a committed relationship, and had been together for an average of 6. However, their histo- In the United States, laws regarding same-sex marriage are ries and specific circumstances varied considerably cases illustrat- currently in flux, but as of this writing, gay marriage is legal in ing some of these differences are included in Table 2. Two couples had been married in countries where same-sex tance. One individual had bipolar disorder, which was controlled by marriage is legal in this case the Netherlands and Canada , and medication and in remission for many years.

He chose not to be the one other couple was in the process of being married in the state sperm donor for that reason. Another man had a history of panic of Connecticut, which has recently legalized same-sex marriage attacks during adolescence. Sperm decisions Typically, couples have made this decision before entering treatment, but it is a subject that warrants careful medical and psychological counseling. Shared sperm cycle Discuss the importance of embryo quality in making this decision. Discuss the fact that such a cycle may result in twins who are biological half-siblings.

FDA regulations Inform the couple that the sperm provider needs to be retested within 7 days of the transfer. Legal contract Counsel couples about the importance of a legal contract and that state laws vary regarding surrogacy and adoption. Oocyte donor Discuss decision-making process regarding an anonymous or nonanonymous oocyte donor.

If nonanonymous, determine whether there will there be future contact between donor and offspring. Disclosure to offspring Discuss their plans for talking to children about the nature of their conception and the circumstances of their birth. All denied current psychiatric symptoms. The men tive, educated, and bear resemblance to the noninseminating partner. His partner and all other partic- not comfortable proceeding, and three couples are waiting to be ipants in this study reported that their families supported them when matched to a gestational carrier.

LESBIAN PARENTHOOD: A Review of the Literature

Nine couples completed treatment, they came out, supported their same-sex relationships, and sup- and all successfully achieved pregnancy. Babies have been born to ported their decision to have children through assisted reproduction. This was a clear choice on their nancy and the other with a twin pregnancy. Of the three couples part, and how they came to the decision fell into the following cat- who chose to have each partner inseminate half of the oocytes and egories: six couples agreed that the older partner should donate the transfer an embryo from both, one couple has 3-year-old twins average age of the inseminating partner was The remaining three couples, who had equal desires Common issues emerge from these cases that are instructive for cli- for biological fatherhood, chose to inseminate equal numbers of oo- nicians counseling gay men planning to become fathers through cytes to transfer an embryo from each partner.

In all cases, implica- ART. In our experience, participants are in a committed relationship tions of transferring more than one embryo, including the risks and have given the idea of becoming fathers and having a family associated with multiple pregnancy, were discussed in detail with together a great deal of thought. They are equally attentive to the de- the couples.

Special emphasis was given to the morbidity and mor- cision as to who will provide the sperm. It may be that one is older, tality associated with preterm birth in ART-related multiple preg- and both agree that he should be first; it may be that one feels more nancies. A maximum of two embryos were transferred per cycle. Twelve couples chose an anonymous oocyte a child.

For those couples who choose to have half the oocytes donor, two chose a friend as donor, and one other couple asked fertilized by one partner and half by the other, counseling should in- the sister of the noninseminating partner to donate. Donor character- clude considerations of treatment outcome. Conversely, a discussion challenges unique to gay men seeking parenthood through ART of such a transfer should include the possibility of having twins who In addition to general American Society for Reproductive share the same maternal genetics but have different paternal genetics Medicine guidelines for intended parents using oocyte donation However, this is often not the case.

Gay men and ART summarized in Table 3. Because potential gay fathers may not always tion and its documentation are a key component of ART treatment have encouragement or support from their families of origin, an for male gay couples. In the United States, gamete donation and a gestational carrier require more education and counseling about gestational surrogacy are regulated by the FDA, which requires the female reproductive system than heterosexual couples partici- sperm and oocyte donors to be thoroughly tested.

When an anony- pating in the same program. The latter often come to us with a history mous donor sperm or oocyte donor who is not known to the gesta- of infertility and are sophisticated about its treatment For gay tional carrier or recipient intended parent is found to be positive for men the process is usually entirely new and unfamiliar. Because they an FDA-mandated infectious disease test, he or she becomes ineligi- will ultimately become very closely involved with the process of ble to donate and an alternate donor must be found. Based on FDA regulations, Within the duration of the study, we have observed that gay male a donor eligibility determination must be made for male member s couples who have successfully conceived in our program have of the gay couple providing sperm 24 , but the use of reproductive a close relationship with their gestational carriers, one that is often cells or tissue from an ineligible directed donor is not prohibited ongoing after the birth of the children.

They appear to appreciate Therefore, although value her female presence. Therefore, positive results for FDA- the birth certificate. The study was conducted in Connecticut, which mandated infectious disease tests need to be carefully evaluated is one of nine states in the United States that has a statute allowing by the physician and discussed in detail with all parties involved. Therefore, in Connecticut, both fathers In addition, the overall health of gay men who intend to be parents can be listed on the birth certificate.

At the other end of the spectrum needs to be carefully evaluated, similar to the evaluation performed are the states of Arkansas and Florida, where adoption by gay per- for heterosexual intended parents seeking parenthood through sons is prohibited Gay male couples need to be very clear about oocyte donation and gestational surrogacy.

Issues for Lesbian- and Gay-Parented Families

Because surrogacy is prohibited in Gay men increasingly choose fatherhood through assisted reproduc- Florida, Indiana, Louisiana, Michigan, Nebraska, Nevada, New tion. Counseling these couples on the medical and emotional York, North Dakota, Texas, Utah, and the District of Columbia 16 , demands of ART with a gestational carrier and oocyte donor is a vital and because these laws are always changing, this information is crucial. Tasker F. Lesbian mothers, gay fathers and their 5. J Dev Behav Pediatr ;— The national lesbian dren of 4 to 8 years old. Hum Reprod ; 2. The gay baby boom: the family study: 1.

Interviews with prospective — New York: New mothers. Am J Orthopsychiatry ;— Children raised in York University Press, Lesbian couples as fatherless families from infancy: family relationships 3. Golombok S, Tasker F. Donor insemination for therapeutic donor insemination recipients: do they and the socioemotional development of children of single heterosexual and lesbian women: issues differ from other patients?

J Psychosom Obstet lesbian and heterosexual mothers. J Child Psychol concerning the welfare of the child. Hum Reprod Gynaecol ;— Psychiatry ;— Baetens P, Brewaeys A.